Online & In-Person Therapy for Self-Esteem in Philadelphia & Pennsylvania
Can you relate to these statements?
I deserve to feel bad about myself.
I’m worried about what others think of me.
I feel disconnected from others.
I’m not good enough.
I’m too much or a burden.
I can never get anything right.
It’s hard to enjoy life when you feel constantly down on yourself and self-critical. Aligned Life Therapy specializes in treating low self-esteem and self criticism through offering evidence-based, compassionate online therapy. The idea that you’re very hard on yourself may have been a recent realization or you may have always felt this way: like you’re either too much or never enough.
Low self-esteem doesn’t have to control your life.
Therapy for self-esteem can help.
Your awareness that you are not good enough is so automatic it’s like a colored filter that shapes how you see everyday. You might not have put it in quite these words, but your inner critic overwhelms you with feelings of shame and hopelessness. You’d like to be kinder to yourself, but it’s hard to know how to start. Our society does not teach these skills and it’s not your fault! You’re ready to dig in and discover how therapy can help.
I know how exhausting and defeating it feels to grapple with low self-esteem day in and day out. I also know you can experience something radically different. You have the ability to put feelings of shame and criticism in their place: as a small part of a much bigger, vibrant life.
Ready to build a kinder sense of self?
What is self-esteem? What are the signs of low self-esteem?
Self-esteem refers to how we feel about ourselves. It reflects your opinion of who you are, what you can do and what you deserve. It influences the degree to which you feel worthy, valuable, and confident about your decisions. Difficulties with self-esteem often contribute to experiences of anxiety, social fears, depression, perfectionism and other mental health struggles. Signs of low self-esteem include an intensely critical inner voice, feelings of overall dissatisfaction with life, difficulty pursuing the things you like to do. If you’re struggling with low-self esteem, you may feel personally deficient or that something is wrong with you that prevents you from living a meaningful life, whether it shows up at work, in relationships or other valued activities. A healthy sense of self-esteem or self-worth is positively associated with overall life satisfaction, accomplishing goals, and healthier, happier relationships.
Why am I so hard on myself? What causes low self-esteem and harsh self-criticism?
Our minds work in ways we would never have chosen for ourselves! From an early age, we learn about the world and try our best to make sense of it. Unfortunately for many (and I mean most!) people, we pick up messages from our families and communities that sow seeds of comparison, competition, and judgement. Naturally, all of these messages get turned inward as a way to stay safe. In cases of mistreatment or abuse, the effects can be particularly damaging.
Often, if we feel we “know” we are bad, unworthy, or not good enough, we then adapt our behavior accordingly. Humans are social creatures, and our minds are wired to avoid painful experiences. These adaptations keep us safe for a time, but then ultimately serve to make us feel bad about ourselves and leave us feeling more and more stuck. Giving up these adaptations is a challenge, because so many of us are taught a “tough love” approach to life and feel we will lose all awareness and motivation if we stop criticizing ourselves.
Healing from low self esteem involves building self awareness and self-compassion. Your unique path in life has led to low self-esteem and/or self-criticism to play an important role. It’s now time to shift into new ways of relating to yourself that foster a sense of safety, vitality and ease within yourself.
What are the “symptoms” of low self-esteem?
Low self-esteem isn’t a diagnosable mental disorder, but rather an understandable outcome to less than ideal circumstances. Any of these patterns may feel familiar:
All or nothing thinking : seeing things as either all terrible or all good.
Negativity bias: Only seeing the negatives in yourself and circumstances.
Over-personalizing: seeing outcomes or events as being your responsibility or fault.
Emotional flooding: feeling overwhelmed by thoughts and sensations that you are bad, stupid or unworthy.
Communication challenges: difficulty speaking up and sharing your needs because they feel like too much or not important enough.
Relationship stress: feeling like you don’t deserve the people in your life or that you are a burden.
Downplaying or ignoring positives: feeling overly modest about accomplishments or not recognizing them altogether.
Assuming the worst: anxiety mixed with low self-esteem can lead to feeling the worst outcome will happen because of you.
Let’s Talk!
What is the best therapy for low self-esteem?
Working with a therapist who specializes in low self-esteem, like Julia McGrath, LMFT at Aligned Life Therapy, will bring an understanding, non-judgemental and compassionate approach to addressing self-esteem. Working with a therapist who is a good fit and truly “gets it”is the highest predictor of a good therapy outcome.
Aligned Life uses evidenced-based strategies drawn from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, and Compassion Focused Therapy to customize the therapy to your unique circumstances. Additionally, Aligned Life emphasizes social identity and a social justice framework in understanding the cultural forces that often contribute to low self-esteem. In therapy for self-esteem you will build self-awareness of how you formed your view of yourself.
Together, we’ll use that knowledge to “talk back” to unhelpful feelings and thoughts about yourself and start seeing yourself in the same way you would a good friend. We’ll use a compassionate approach to looking at growth areas while also affirming your intrinsic goodness.
Should I get therapy for low self-esteem?
When you make the decision to begin therapy for self-esteem, you are already sending yourself the message that you are worthy of feeling something different. How we view ourselves ultimately shapes how we view the world, how happy we are, and whether we feel a deep sense of satisfaction. Therapy for low self-esteem is often deeply rewarding. You may have experienced trauma or difficulties in your family growing up that we will work through as part of the therapy. You’ll develop a self-compassionate voice that can slowly begin to influence how you feel about yourself and the world around you. The process can be fun as well, trying new things and exploring who you really are underneath it all. If you are on the fence, please don’t hesitate to reach out. We offer free consultations to help you make the best decision for you.
How do I get started with self-esteem therapy at Aligned Life Therapy?
Aligned Life Therapy provides therapy for self-esteem in Philadelphia and throughout Pennsylvania. If you’re ready to get started with online anxiety therapy, follow these steps:
Get in touch - Reach out to me by email or through the contact form to ask about availability. I will return your message within 24 hours on business days to schedule a free 15 minute phone consultation.
Have your free consultation - This call will give you a chance to ask any questions you have before your first appointment. It also allows me to get to know you, what’s bringing you in, and determine if we are a good fit. Your first session will be scheduled during the call.
Fill out consent forms and intake questionnaire -. In order to dive right in, I’ll send you a secure link to my client portal after our consultation. Fill out these forms and read the consent and practice policy documents carefully prior to the first session.
Receive your video chat link - Before your session, you’ll receive reminders by text and email with a link to the video chat you will use for your session.
Have your first session - From a private and comfortable location, click the link at your scheduled session time. The first few sessions will be focused on getting to know you, your concerns and collaborating on treatment goals.
